Infussion today

As Farrah said, "I get sweaty palms going to the clinic." That is exactly how i felt all weekend. We got to Emory at 8:30 this morning, saw the doctor at 10:15 and of course she was in a rush, spoke with the clinical nurse, she basically gave me a bunch of papers and said read it over and let me know if you want to do the study. I am back to being a number and it stinks. I finally got in to get my infusion about 12:00. I had to take my premeds for an hour and then i got my herceptin. It wasn't so bad, but not my favorite place. We got home around 3:20. Long day for all of us.

I am going to look at a few alternative clinics, but this study may exclude all alternatives. Not happy about that, but that seems to be the nature of clinical trials. Therefore i am going to have to be on a strict diet. Not sure what that is yet, but I am sure it wont include anything with sugar, dairy, fat or meat. The only day i will have real problems with this is when they give me my premeds. The decadron (steroid) makes me so hungry and gives me roid rage. I may have to eat my arm off on those days except that is meat. Oh well!

This study has two trials in this phase. Not sure which one i will be on yet, but i either get some meds everyday or every 8 days. I am eager to get as much in my body as possible, but the side effects include vomiting. So not looking forward to that.

Sammy tested for her green belt in karate today and got an award at swim practice for her cooperation, leadership, hard work, etc. So very proud of her. This is Gavin's last week of school. He has 6 weeks of camp that will help and give Sammy and i some time together. Not to mention time for all my appointments.

I know you all think i am crazy for watching the Farrah story, but it really helped me put my emotions in place. Yes i cried and begged God to save my life, but it also helped me understand why i feel the way i do and go on with everything i have. It is not Farrah i am interested in, but that she is going thru what i am going thru. Just like my support group. It is amazing how a little empathy can really help.

I find out my MUGA results tomorrow and have an MRI for my back June 1. I am hoping it is not cancer, but it would be really nice to know why it hurts so much everyday.

BTW, i don't think i explained this very well, but we never made it to Chicago because they thought i had pneumonia. Luckily i did not and the antibiotics cleared up what ever it was except my back. We will not be going back to Chicago anytime soon because they don't have a trial currently available. I am excluded from most trials because i am triple positive (Her 2+, ER/PR). I know this means nothing to you , but the Her 2 is what makes my cancer so bad. It basically teaches my cells to reject all the drugs they give me. This new drug (RAD 001) breaks down the cells so the Tykerb and Herceptin can penetrate the cells in order to kill them. The bad news is that any Chemo including this one goes after all cells, not just the bad ones. That is why I could get so sick on these drugs. The study should open in the next two weeks and i will keep you all posted.

Thanks for all your prayers
Laura