Monday, April 18, 2011

New treatment

So I started the sallisinium last Monday and so far so good. There are a few things thar are a challenge like remembering to take the 2 pills 3G per day but only on the weekends where I get IV's all week. I get a lot more constipated and more pain but the pain is good it means the the Lymphs are selling and the homeopathic is working. It's hard to find things to eat since my diet is even more restrictive and I'm starving all the time. Good thing a chef is cooking for me. She has made some amazing stuff for the entire family. The weather has been incredible here so we have been outside a lot. That is always good medicine for me.

I have really emotional this past two weeks so a wake up with puffy eyes quite often so that's attractive, but I have also been able to pay it forward many times recently. It is amazing no matter how much pain I'm in, I always feel so much better when I can help someone else.

My sweet husband has been extra sweet this week and I have been eating it up.

Gavin told me last night that he loves me so much that he wants to cry. Love that kid

Monday, April 11, 2011

How much is a life worth

How much should you spend to save a life? How indebt should you go? Should you sell your house, cash out the kids college funds/savings, empty out the 401k??? How do you know when enough is enough? You can only beg your friends for so long. Life is hard and I'm willing to fight but at what cost and is there a correct answer?

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Only God knows

So I decided it was time to really explain what is going on especially with Sammy. It was tuff especially when we talked about the stuff I might miss. Gavin started talking about Yoda dying, but gave me a huge hug and told me he hopes I don't die before we go to Hawaii. Got to love how kids think.

Saw the oncologist today and she doesnt seem as concerned as the trial oncologist but she is quite the optimist, so that gave me hope. She was willing to let me try some experimental treatments and then start chemo again if they dont work. She didn't mind the cancer being everywhere but doesnt like that I'm symtomatic. Meaning I have abdominal and back pain.

Preparing for the worst, hoping for the best and fighting like hell

Friday, April 1, 2011

Not what we were expecting at all.

Spoke with the trial oncologist tonight and she doesn't want me to do the bronchoscope because there are 2 spots in abdominal area, a new tumor in the liver, one in the pancreas, and 11 nodes in the lungs. She said the radiologist feels they are all metastases and even if the lungs are not she doesn't want to put me thru the test if were going to proceed the same way. The good news is oh wait there is none this time. But I'm feeling great despite what the PET shows. We see the local oncologist this week and will find out more. There are a few alternative treatments were investigating that sound very promising. Were praying hard here, thanks for all of yours.